What happens to the child of an abusive parent when they die?

It’s natural for an outsider to think those thoughts when they hear an abusive parent died. Yet for the child of an abuser, regardless of their age, there is still grief. Albeit, a different kind of grief. For the average person, the loss of a parent is a loss of memories.

Should I feel relief when my abusive spouse or parent dies?

People often are surprised when they feel grief at the death of an abusive spouse or parent. “Shouldn’t I feel satisfied or relief?” they often ask. Actually, due to the complexity of emotions associated with grief they usually do feel a mix of emotions including relief.

Do children feel like they are being abused by their parents?

No, abuse is the farthest thing from their minds. Instead, they have hopes and desires for a future with someone. When that person dies or leaves they feel the loss of all those shattered dreams. In the case of an abusive parent, children often grow up wishing for parents like other children seem to have.

How do you feel about an abuser who has passed away?

There are three basic feelings toward an abuser who has passed: Love, hate, or conflicted feelings. I suggest you think over your history with this parent who is gone and think of it as panning for gold.

Is it okay to not attend a parent’s funeral?

Yes, some will think you are the bad guy; that you dishonored your parent by not even attending their funeral. But there may be others who understand and support your decision. Regardless, this is an opportunity for you to protect yourself emotionally and continue recovery.

What does it feel like when Your Abuser is dead?

Some people feel relief that their abuser is dead. That’s perfectly normal, but other emotions may follow after that initial relief, like anger that this person never had to answer for what they did to you in a court of law, or to you, personally, or to your family if they abused everyone.

Do you have an obligation to attend a funeral if you are estranged?

Whether it was a parent, sibling, or distant cousin, if they were estranged, the respondents felt no obligation to attend their funeral. It did not make any difference whether the estrangement was recent or a long time ago.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQXmAIBaf-E