Why do I get defensive when I make a mistake?

From an evolutionary perspective, humans likely developed our defensive tendencies as a mental health survival mechanism of sorts. In a healthy manner, defensive thoughts and actions help us pick ourselves up after an embarrassment or mistake, or maintain a sense of optimism when faced with a tough situation.

What causes a person to be so defensive?

Summary: Research has shown that defensiveness in response to wrongdoing is exacerbated by making the wrong doer feel like they’re an outcast. Defensive behaviours are common responses when people feel personally attacked but can undermine our ability to identify problems and find solutions.

Why is a person always so defensive?

People react defensively because they anticipate or perceive a threat in their environment, not usually because they’re just wanting to be difficult. Unfortunately, defensive behavior creates a reciprocal cycle. Defensive behavior can be a complex and murky issue.

Why do people keep apologizing to me?

Over-apologizing is a common problem for those of us with codependent tendencies. It’s a symptom of our low self-esteem, fear of conflicts, and laser-sharp focus on other people’s needs and feelings.

Why are some people more prone to being defensive than others?

In regards to defensive behavior, some people are just more prone to it. Some people have nervous systems that respond more frequently and intensely to sensory stimulation. They may have a more exaggerated startle response than other people do, even in the same family.

What happens when you get defensiveness and criticism all too easily?

And now their defensiveness is leading back to your next criticism. Which will lead to their next defense. This can happen all too easily. In a few minutes, defensiveness and criticism can escalate, and turn into contempt and stonewalling. That’s not good.

How can I avoid being defensive when talking to people?

The good news is that there are other behaviors that will create a less defensive and more supportive climate. These are the behaviors that make defensive behavior less likely: Rather than placing a judgment on the person you’re talking to, you merely describe whatever actions, words, or qualities you want to discuss.

What are the signs of a defensive person?

#2 They’re overly critical. When someone is overly critical, they relish in defensive behavior. They’re constantly looking at the negative aspects of any situation, which causes defensiveness. If you make suggestions or provide constructive criticism, defensive people easily become sensitive and, well, defensive.